urgghh....... tension! menyampah pun ada kadang-kadang tuh. hahaha seriously i cant smile right now! sumpah tertekan.... apa tah slh aq. benci btul kt aq.aq pun xtahu lah...kepala otak sgt lah berserabut.....jiwa xtenang langsung,,apakah semua kejadian ini ada hikmah?yes it is! supposed think wisely before u start to open up your mouth.
different cases with me... where i dont know the real source of my situation why i being like this. hari ini aja. aq rasa kosong sgt. sgt lah xbermaya...with my headache every day n each time im in the office ONLY! (noted it..ONLY,,,, i get bored with this situation.. bosan dengan office! bosan stay sini! menyampah dgn my surrounding seriously!... xtipu! bosan when u have to tickle back their heart sdangkan korang sendiri xtahu what uve gone wrong until they treat u like that... freak man.! xsuke lah...... obviously they cant hide from their smiling faces..how they hate to look at me! lalalalal!!!........
do i care?? yes i am!!!!!..... i have to face them everyday!... i work with them! i need their guidance as i am a trainee.... despite by having ayaz by my side.. i still cant cheer my self up ! hahah i hate it ok!..i hate it so much when i have to wear a mask every second! coz of what?? nk poke3 lah hati mereka tu... gee... i am entirely not care of it! xkesah lah!..... and i wont retract my words back!! no..no i promise!....
but for the time bieng nie lah kan... aq will try my best untuk x hard feeling toward them... even aq sebenanrnya such a very sensitive person!!!!!.. bila aq dh terasa.. haha smpi bila2 lah aq akan ingt kan...... tah la.... serabut untuk difikirkan... n aq kne lah try open cket minda nie,,,tuk take it as a positive things.... =,=
hahahaha!!!!!!!........... tp aq moody bkn kerana hal ini ok....tp hal lain..y aq sendiri kne godek2 balik knp aq jd mcm nie.... cm mati jek jiwa... well talk bout it.... aq ad permasalahn y i need to see the ustaz!! lah.... i dont know where my spirit has gone... kne culik mayb,,, aq research tuk JIWA KOSONG mcm aq...puncanya knp.... nie dsebabkan tu adlah amaran dr Allah SWT atas dosa2 silam aq.... agar aq kembali ke jalan Allah dan mungkin juga kerana aq kurang ingt pd y esa.... mungkin selama ini ibadah y aq lakukan tidak ikhals dan sempurna...thats y lh kan... aq jd mcm nie...... even now im struggle hardly to become a pious person! aq nk dekatkan diri aq dgn Allah..tp masa tu belum tiba lg...which means.... aq kne lbih ikhlas lg dlm menjalankan ibadah di samping berusaha bersihkan setiap deria aq dari maksiat.yesh! insyallah.... i will try my best ..Aminn..
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